a letter for someday...

Dear daughter of mine,
      Someday I hope you read this letter,  and understand your mother's heart. Because today I'm afraid you don't. In the midst of disciplining you the other day, you looked me square in the eyes and told me you would never forgive me as long as you live. The parent in me, thought to myself that it's okay if you don't forgive me. I knew I was doing what was best for you. The mother in me, the part of me that has loved you since the moment you were conceived, wanted to squeeze you tightly in my arms, and tell you that if you knew how much I loved you... how I was teaching you in love, that you would never be able to hold anger in your heart against me.
      You are growing up far too fast my sweet girl. I want you to know (someday) that everyday, I wake up and pray that I will be, and can be, the best Mama I can be for you. I pray that you will one day love the lord, that you will achieve your greatness in life (whatever that may be), and that you will grow to be all of the things you were meant to be. I hope that you always live your life with bigger faith than fear.
      Mostly, on days like today when I fear that someday you may wonder why I made you learn certain lessons, certain ways, that you will know that I always made my decisions based on love and faith. Being your mom, is the greatest, and hardest job I have ever had. Somedays I wonder if I am adequately made for such a important and huge job.  Then, when I look into your big brown eyes I always know, this was what I was meant to be.
      I hope someday, you will understand that part of loving you is teaching you. There will be many more lessons to learn my love, and we will learn them together I'm sure! I want you to know, there will never be a day, no matter how old you get, that I don't lay you down on the feet of Jesus in prayer. I love you with all that I am.

-Mama



(today, this is the song that I listen to over and over...)

eleven years ago today...

 Eleven years ago today, two baby faced kids said 'I do', with tear filled vows.

 People doubted that it was real. People thought we were too young. Some said it would never last...

Eleven years later, we have grown up together, learning along the way, and falling a little more in love each year.
God gave me the gift of marrying my best friend. He knew all along what our story would look like written out.

Dear Matthew, I look forward to growing old with you.
Thank you for putting up with me for the last 11 years, and for making my every wish come true!
Thank you for our amazing life, for our precious babies, and for loving me even when it's hard.


Love you, Manda

become great...

(found on pinterest)


How many times have you found yourself lost in the shadow of feeling belittled, and unseen by those who are around you? Have you then met someone so free, so happy, so great, that they made you feel that way too? Surround yourself with those who make you feel great, because life is too short to feel little! Be that person. Believe you are that person. So that your special God given light, can shine through you!

One of the GREATEST people I have ever had the privilege of meeting, would have celebrated his birthday yesterday. He passed away too soon, and is missed each day,,, but because of his ability to make others feel great, his example, his energy, his love lives on, inside of many who adored him!

Happy Birthday Papa, you are missed! Thank you for making me always feel so special!

I have a third grader....

The other night we took a hike/walk/jog/scooter/bike ride - depending on who you were :)

 ... Bella found a 'fluff ball' a 'REALLY BIG ONE'!
 I suggested she make a BIG wish and that she should make it a good one!
It was two days before school started. Today she started third grade (WOW).
I wonder if her wish that evening had anything to do with her upcoming school day?
I guess I'll never know. If I had a wish I could give her, it would be that she would have JOY inside her so BIG that it would shine out in everything she does! I hope that as she grows she is never too afraid to dream BIG, and go for it. Yes, life is scary (I told her the other day), but it's the scary things in life that make us know we are ALIVE!

On an honest note: I have first day of school photos (one or two) (I was only allowed a couple outside of the house, because outside of the school would be SO embarrassing!) Anyhow, I am too sleepy and tired to download them, so they will come. I promise! Hope you are getting back into the routine a bit more gracefully than I am! :)

Summer 2011

Today officially marked our last day of Summer 2011, in our house. It's back to school for Bella bright and early tomorrow morning, and Meritt follows on Thursday. Holy cow summer sure flies by in a hurry... we had a great summer. We got a lot of our projects done. But, we also spent a lot of great quality time doing all sorts of fun family things. In the grand scheme of life, I'm sure that's what we will all remember most when we think back on our summer this year. The lazy evenings at the pool. Watching daddy play softball. Playing at the park. Eating dinner on the patio. Paddle boating on the lake. Our long weekend in Black Butte. Our hike at Cascadia to see the waterfall. Our boat ride on Clear Lake. The week spent with Grammy D and Aunt Christy. Walks with Lola. Painting pictures outside with Mama. Treats at Starbucks when we've behaved.... and ice cream treats just because. It's been fun summer 2011, but it's time for you to go. It's time for back to school, backpacks, homework, chilly nights, sweaters, and playing in the leaves. See you again next year!